Context
I didn’t have any psenti sem since I was interning all through my final year. Recently, I took a month with no agenda and another five with a fast changing agenda with a lot of control over my time. It was very rewarding.
Though I would go back and still have no psenti sem in college if I was in a career situation similar to the beginning of my final year, I see huge merit in taking a break and advocate for it whenever stars align.
I spoke to more people who did something similar and see a repeating pattern, so I thought I’ll document.
Wiring- human doing and not human being
I had too much self worth attached to my job and work. It took time + active effort to be comfortable with not having a tag and not having something to show for (to myself, no one asked for it). Initially, I found it VERY hard to wake up to an empty calendar.
Once you get rid of it, some serious independent vulnerable thinking starts to happen. 🧵
A 1000 thoughts, then what matters most to you and why
Given how there was nothing to distract myself with while having enough contact with the world to not lose the sense of materialism, I found it easier to delve deeper into what’s most imp to me and stress test that with both past experiences and future thought experiments.
A case for high intensity
I like playing high intensity. In retrospect, the break helped my revive my sense of purpose that lead to a long term amp up in intensity. I was very far from any kind of burnout but in future if I think I’m tending to burnout, I’ll take an absolute break rather than taking back seat at work. I see multiple folks doing the latter but the break gave me some perspective here.
Game you play is as important as how you play it
Externalities (mostly markets and people around) drive most utility. Destination if both magnitude and direction. The experience left me with deep conviction and perspective on direction and as it has already had a huge impact.
Wider perspective
As I went through the perspective of drifting on the human being <> doing axis, I realised how I have much more control over how I feel and energy I operate with than I used to think. I also spent time on a bunch of things I always wanted to but found excuses for.
Everyone who has gone through a similar break comes out with something as valuable, if not more. Wish you all the luck!
This was churned rather quickly. I request my future agent to smoothen it with better structure, fonts and a couple of memes.
